BREAKING: Blago!

Today the blogosphere (Blagosphere?) is abuzz over the hilariously corrupt antics of Illinois Governor Rod R. Blagojevich. Black nerd blogger Ta-Nehisi Coates at the Atlantic sums it up in terms we Epic Mailers can understand:

"Incredible. Blagojevich was already under investigation. And then he tries to sell Obama's Senate seat? I don't think I've ever seen anything like this. This dude tried to auction the Senate seat of the President-Elect of the United States. Wow. They haven't even invented a machine that can calculate the Fail Factor here. I do believe we have gone to Interstellar Fail. Intergalactic, perhaps."

If possible, I'd like to see Matt "Chicago Machine Politics" Newman give us an inside look at the insanity brewing in Al Capone's abode, but before then, I just want to be the millionth person to point out what an enormous bullet Obama has dodged here. Honestly, the whole process of appointing vacant Senate seats is shady as hell, and it's not uncommon to find pretty blatant cases of nepotism and back-stratching. It wouldn't have been odd for Obama's team to have at least considered giving Blagojevich or his wife an appointment to some post in return for the Senate appointment they wanted. Luckilly, they're much smarter than that, and word on the street is that total baller and personal hero of mine Rahm Emmanuel is the one who blew the whistle on Blagojevich. But before doing so, he made sure that federal investigators have Blago (who's every third word is "fuck") on tape calling Obama a "motherfucker" and saying "They're not willing to give me anything... Fuck Obama".

Said Blagojevich as he was arrested at his home this morning: "The bitch set me up!"